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英作文

こんばんは。 英語で文章を書く練習をしているのですが、自分では間違いが分からないので、添削をお願いします。 文法などの誤りがあれば、ご指摘願います。 また、こう書けばもっとよい、などもあれば嬉しく思います。 １　妻が何を着て行くか決めるのに時間がかかったので、家を出るのが少し遅くなった。→It took long time for my wife to decide what to wear ,so we were late leaving our house. ２　大きいものも小さいものも、すべてのものは、小さすぎて見ることができない原子からできている。→Whether big or small, everything consists of atoms at which we can't look too small. ３　海外留学を志すものは、まず自国でよい教育を受け、自国の文化と伝統を身に付けることが必要である。→First,those who will study abroad are good educated in their country,and they should understand their culture and tradition. ４　先生に、その翻訳を私の息子が母親の助けなしでやったということを納得させるのは、不可能でした。→It was impossible that I convinced the teacher that my son did the translation without his mother's help. ５　日本の代表的な古典建築を見たいなら、寺院を訪れるのが最もよいでしょう。→It is visiting temples that the best way for you to look at Japanese typical architectures.

  • 英語
  • 回答数4
  • ありがとう数5

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  • ベストアンサー
回答No.1

1はＯＫだと思います。 2Whether big or small, everything consists of atoms at which we can't look too small. →Whether big or small, everything consists of atoms which are too small to see. 3First,those who will study abroad are good educated in their country,and they should understand their culture and tradition. まず「必要である」という表現にするため、need to beとかshould be とか、supposed to be等の表現にするべきです。 their culture and tradition.ですが、この場合彼ら（海外を志す者） 自身の文化・伝統という意味になってしまうかもしれないので、ここ では、understand the culture and tradition of their own country とでもした方がよいと思います。 →First those who will study abroad should receive a good education, and understand the culture and tradition of their own country in advance. 4It was impossible that I convinced the teacher that my son did the translation without his mother's help. 文法的には、合ってるのかもしれませんが、 まず、it is impossible that～という文章よりは、it is impossible to～の方が自然だと思います。convince the teacher that～の方は これでＯＫだと思いますが。 →It was impossible (for me)to convince the teacher that my son did the translation without his mother's help. 5It is visiting temples that the best way for you to look at Japanese typical architectures. 何となく良さそうなのですが、that以下の文章は主語（名詞）しか 無いのでだめです。 あと、for youは入れてもいいけど、ここでは要らないと思います。 この文章は単純に、以下のように修正できます。 Visiting temples is the best way to look at Japanese typical architectures. パッと見て、間違ってるなと思ったところを修正してみました。 ご参考にして頂ければ幸いです。

ikuyamorihs
質問者

お礼

すべての文について、本当に丁寧に添削していただき、ありがとうございます。感謝しています。

その他の回答 (3)

  • saham3
  • ベストアンサー率24% (19/77)
回答No.4

下記、ご参考まで　 妻が何を着て行くか決めるのに時間がかかったので、家を出るのが少し遅くなった。→It took long time for my wife to decide what to wear ,so we were late leaving our house. →As my wife took a long time to choose her dress, we were a little late leaving our house. ２　大きいものも小さいものも、すべてのものは、小さすぎて見ることができない原子からできている。→Whether big or small, everything consists of atoms at which we can't look too small. →Everything, whether big or small, consists of atoms which are too small in size to see visually. ３　海外留学を志すものは、まず自国でよい教育を受け、自国の文化と伝統を身に付けることが必要である。→First,those who will study abroad are good educated in their country,and they should understand their culture and tradition. →Those who want to study abroad should 1st of all receive good education in thier own country in order to fully understand thier culture and tradition. ４　先生に、その翻訳を私の息子が母親の助けなしでやったということを納得させるのは、不可能でした。→It was impossible that I convinced the teacher that my son did the translation without his mother's help. →I could not convince the teacher that my son had made the translation by himself without his mother's help. ５　日本の代表的な古典建築を見たいなら、寺院を訪れるのが最もよいでしょう。→It is visiting temples that the best way for you to look at Japanese typical architectures. →I suggest visiting temples is the best way if you want to see the typical ancient architectures of Japan.

ikuyamorihs
質問者

お礼

違う表現で文を書いてくれて、どうもありがとうございます。表現の幅を広げられるように、頑張ります。

回答No.3

三人称の使い方に問題があるようです。 例えば１の場合妻の力の及ばない理由で遅れるならitで正解ですが、そうで無いので不自然です。 My wife took longtime to decideとすべきです。 ４もI couldn' convice the teacherでしょう。 ５のケースはItより仮想相手としてYouを使う方が英語らしい。 If you'd like to see..., temples are best place to visit. ３も同様でthoseよりyouにした方が英語らしくなります。 If you are dreaming of studying abroad, you should... ２については難しい文なのでもっと単語を勉強されることでしょう。 もうワンランク上の言葉を選ぶべきです。 例えばすべての物をeverythingにしてしまうのは稚拙です。 原子からできているのconsistsは変ですし、見ることができないにlookは間違いです。原子はsmall程度の小ささではないでしょう。 日本語で文を精錬してしまうと訳しにくいので、一度平易な表現に変えて英文にしてから精錬すると自然な表現になります。

ikuyamorihs
質問者

お礼

アドバイス、ありがとうございます。 いずれは、難しい単語も書いていきたいと思います。

  • ocanada
  • ベストアンサー率30% (33/107)
回答No.2

1.long time -> a long time 2. ... atoms at which we can't look too small ------>atoms which are too small to see 3.Firstの位置がおかしいです。 Those planning to study abroad first need to be well educated in their own country and have an understanding of their culture and tradition. 4.It was impossible to convince the teacher that my son did the translation without his mother's help. I/We couldnt convince the teacher..... 5.Japaneseとtraditionalの位置が不自然なので逆にしました。あと、architectureはs付けない方が良いでしょう。 (In my opinion/If you ask me) visiting temples is the best way to look at traditional Japanese architecture.

ikuyamorihs
質問者

お礼

丁寧に添削していただき、ありがとうございました。助かります。

  1. カテゴリ
  2. 学問・教育
  3. 語学
  4. 英語

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