The Relationship Between Social Status and Health in the Context of Food
- Consideration of social status and health is crucial in discussing the topic of food. Various food-related issues such as unbalanced nutrition, overeating, and food shortage still persist.
- For example, many people rely heavily on instant foods in their daily diet, which can lead to health problems due to the lack of nutrition. One friend of mine suffered from a severe stomachache for three months, which was caused by excessive consumption of instant foods.
- Another issue is the coexistence of overeating and food shortage. This can be seen in the stark contrast between obese individuals and malnourished children. It is essential to address the imbalance in food distribution and ensure that those who have excess food share it with the less fortunate.
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「Ｓｏｃｉａｌ ｓｔａｔｕｓとＨｅａｌｔｈを関連させて食について論じなさい」 字数指定はありませんが、過去の問題から推測すると少なくとも１００字は必要だと思います。 点数を２５点満点でつけて頂きたいです。 よろしくお願いします。 (1)It is important to consider both social status and Health. This is why there are many food problems such as unbalanced nutrition, eating without measure, and food shortage yet to be resolved. (2)There are, for example, my friends who eat many instsnt foods almost everyday. One of my friends had had a serious stomachache for three monthes. This desease was due to overeating instant foods. It is true that the instant foods are low expense, but they lack in nutrition. (3)Arother example is overeating and foodshortage. Former and later are related with each other. I have watched a very fat people and small, poor children who are not able to eat enough foods on TV. I often think the part of which people who eat to excess eat should be given to poor people. (4)There are other many problems yet be resolved. We shoud take food problems like above exampleks into considering .
- sho03
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まずは、目に付いたとこだけ一通り。 （１）"that is why"ではなく "that is because"では？ ”resolved”は”solved”。 （２）第一文there areは不自然。 それと次文以降の展開を考えれば第１・２文の主語はそれぞれ"One of my friends"、"He"にすべきです。あなたの文では第１文と第２文の主体が違って見えます。もし主体を変えることを意識してそうしたのだとしても、文の展開上あきらかにおかしいです。 （３）”former and latter” 普通は ”The former and the latter”でしょう。 ここではTheyでいいと思いますが。第３文。なぜsmallのあとにコンマを？それと太った人をいれる理由もわからない。第四文。文がややこしすぎる。工夫がほしい。 （４）”many problems yet be resolved”は"many problems yet to be solved" 【内容】 この問題は社会的地位と健康を関連付けて、食について述べろといっています。 それが出来ているのか （Ａ）部分 （Ｂ）全体 とわけて考えていきましょう。 （Ａ） あなたは（１）の冒頭で、社会的地位と健康について考えるのは重要なことだ。 と述べています。導入として適切です。 しかし、それだけではなぜ重要なのかがわからない。 あなたはそれを以降の文でそれを説明していきます。（おそらく） （１）の第二文では「未解決の食に関する問題がたくさんある」と述べています。 その例として （２）⇒インスタント食品のとりすぎで、健康に支障をきたした友人の例 （３）⇒飽食・過食をする人がいる一方で、飢えに苦しむ人がいるという事実 をあげました。 さて、このうちのどこに社会的地位に関する内容がありますか？ まったく見当たりませんよ。 さらに各文のつながりもよくわかりません。 （１）の第一文と第二文のつながり。 展開的に第二文は第一文の理由を述べることになりますが 理由になっていない。というより、第一文が第二文の理由になっている。 上でthat is becauseになおしたのはそれが理由です。（しかし、第二文の内容が不適切なためにこうしても文のおかしさは残りますが） （１）と（２）・（３）のつながり。 あくまで、（１）の要旨が社会的地位と健康の間には重要な関連性があるということだとして考えます。そうすると、食と健康の関連についての例である（２）と食と社会（決して社会的地位ではない）の関連についての例である（３）は適さないことになるのがわかりますか？（２）と（３）は社会的地位と健康の間に関連があることを具体的に立証するものではなくてはなりません。 そして最後に（４）。 あなたは結論として「ほかにも未解決の問題がたくさんある。食問題を考慮にいれるべきだ」と述べました。しかし、１～３までの論理展開に社会的地位と健康の関連がないために、これもおかしい。 他にもパラグラフ内にいろいろと論理的に変なところがありますが、 全部は指摘しません。 （Ｂ） 全体的になにを述べたいのかがわかりません。 支離滅裂です。いいたいことをちゃんとメモしてから英語を書き始めましょう。 最後に点数について。 この解答の具体的な点数については不明です。 英作文は文法さえあえば、論理はどうでもいいとする大学もあります。 しかし、個人的に難関大学は最低限の論理も見ていると思います。 ですから、難関大学以外では平均程度とれるかもしれませんが、難関大学では かなり低評価になると思います。
その他の回答 (1)
- ohioan4506
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こんにちは。Social statusというのは社会的地位のことで、例えば社会的地位の高い人が健康に払う関心、意識は高いのかどうか、高ければ食に関しても健康的なもの、オーガニックのものを食べる傾向がある、とか、社会的地位の高い人は収入も高いので、食費にお金をかけることができる、とかそのような点を論じるのではないでしょうか。
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- 英作文の添削をおねがいします
英作文の添削をお願いします。 テーマ：食の安全について（自分の食生活とみんなが健康的で安全なものを食べるために社会はどうしたらよいか） 錠けン：150字以上 ３パラグラフ構成以上 序論・本論・結論が明確であること Today, the problems of food quality and safety have been in the news more than before. As you know, eating is one of the most important habits in daily life, so I care about what I eat every day. Because I live with my family, my mother or I can cook by her or myself. Thus, I can eat healthy food such as flesh vegetables, fruits, meat and fish. However, if I have to live alone, I should sometimes buy the meal at the convenience store when I am busy and unable to cook. In addition, this is the problem for people who live alone. Although a lot of convenience store stand everywhere in the city, most of meals they sell are not healthy, like high-calorie, salty, or including high levels of chemicals. Eating these foods usually harm their health. I suggest that society should make the convenience stores sell more healthy food if they make sure that we all eat good and healthy food. When they so, even people who live themselves will be able to eat safety and be more healthy.（１８３words） 本論の展開（自分の食生活から社会全体に結び付ける展開）が思い浮かばず、 無理やり結論にもっていった感じがいなめません。。。 英作文を書くときに軽く構成は書き出すものの、何度も消して書いてを繰り返してしまうのですが、 これをあまりしなくて済むコツなどあれば教えていただきたいです。 よろしくお願いします。
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- 英作文の添削をお願いします。
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あなたはあなたの国を誇りに思いますか という質問に、 Yes, I am. Japan has many traditional foods. Natto, sushi and tempura are good examples. They are eaten by not only Japanese, but also foreign people. They are very delicious. I want more many people to eat them. と答えると、1文3点で15点満点中何点もらえますか Yes, I am は、採点に入りません 中3の英作文の問題です おかしい文法があったら教えてください 採点、アドバイスよろしくお願いします！！
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- 自由英作文の添削をお願いします
周りに添削を頼めるような人がいないので、自由英作文の添削をお願いします。ネット上で細かく添削するのは大変だと思いますので、文法上誤っている点の指摘や全体を見ての感想・アドバイスをいただけるとうれしいです。よろしくお願いします。 （問）次の意見について１００文字以上の英文で意見を述べなさい。 Multicalturalism is important in today\'s world. （答） I agree with this statement. Firstly,more and more people in the world go abroad to study and to earn money these days.There are many foreign people around us.If we adopt particular culture,we can\'t get along with people who have the different culture. Secondly,they know different things from us.we can get many knowledge from them.It is a pity that we cat\'t learn many things by discrimination. Certainly,if we live in the place where thare are people who have the same culture,we feel comfortable and happy. But it is much interesting that we interact with them. Aiso,Muiticulturalism is adopted including Canada,America,and France,and those countries flourish. Thus,Multiculturalism is important in today\'s world.
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