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テーマ:印象に残っている贈り物 Most impressing present in my life is a watch that my father gave me when I passed the exam to enter the high school. My father used the watch before I was born, and he wouldn't put away it even though he was given a new watch by my mother and sister. I think the watch will have been very important for my father. So, I was very surprised when he gave it to me. At first, I hesitated to receive it, but I received it in the end because my father said with smiling that "I use this new watch". The watch was what my mother and sister gave him. My watch and my father's watch is very different because mine is very old and father's is new. However both of them are filled with love of my family. 文法や構成について指摘してください。


  • 英語
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The most memorable gift in my life is a watch that my father gave to me when I passed the high school entrance exam. He has used the watch since before I was born, and he never put it away even when he was given a new one by my mother and sister. I think the watch is very important for him. So, I was very surprised and hesitated to receive it when he gave it to me. I however finally received it because he told me as smiling at me that he would use new one from my mother and sister. Althogh my very old watch and his new watch look very different, both are surely filled with love of our family. まず、同じフレーズの繰り返しが気になりました。 読者に幼い印象を与えますので、整理したり代名詞を使ったりしましょう。 文法的には、過去完了形を使うべきところもありましたが、上の修正案ではそれを使わずに書いてみました。 私も上の修正案に自信があるわけではなく、まだ改善の余地があるように感じていますが、参考にしてください。





  • 英作文の添削

    英作文の添削をお願いします ①よい席を取りたかったので、早めに劇場へ行った Since I had taken a good seat, I went to theater. ②通勤列車がとても混んでいたので、ずっと立っていなければならなかった I had standing all the time because commuter train was very crowded. ③父の車は修理してあるので、バスで仕事に行く必要はない Now that my father’s car is repaired,I don’t need go to job by bus. ④彼の家に行ったとき、彼が留守だったのでがっかりした I was disappointed when I went to his house because he was absenced. たくさんありますが、よろしくお願いします

  • 英語の添削をお願いいたします。

    My fatherというタイトルです My father sells car parts. He works every day.He never takes a day off. This is because he works for me. I can go to university because he works for me. Therefore,I am grateful to him. 変なところありますか?ご指摘お願いします。

  • 英作文の添削を

    課題で、"A Part-time Job for Me"というタイトルの英作文をしました。 文法的な間違いや、不自然な表現がなく、ちゃんと意味が通るかどうか不安なので、添削をしていただきたいと思い、投稿しました。 よろしくお願いします。 I don’t work part-time now.   Because I’m very busy with study now and I cannot find an offer of a part-time job that condition conforms to me, nearby my house. However, it is not that I don't work at all.  My relative sometimes asks me to mow the grass of the field and vacancy.  And she asks me help with the final income tax return at the end of the year.  Another relative, cannot use computer, sometimes asks me to make documents with a Microsoft Office Word.  The member of a municipal assembly of the acquaintance’s husband of my father asks me to create his Website.  The reward of these work is more expensive than the wage of the general part-time job.  However, there are few incomes because there is little work. I will want to do work of distributing mails at the post office in next winter vacation if I work part-time.  I've ever done this work when I was a tenth grader, and this work was pleasant.  And there is a post office near my house.  I can go there by bicycle in about thirty minutes. It is not suitable to deliver mails for me.  When I worked once to deliver mails by bicycle, I took time very much to finish work because I cannot ride a motor bicycle.  So I delivered it by bicycle.  But I ran slow by bicycle.  And I wasn’t good to learn the route very much.   Therefore the vice-postmaster changed my work into distributing mails.  This work was easier than delivering mails.  It was worm in post office and I was able to have confectionery, oranges, juice and for a break.  But my wage was higher than the other part-time worker because the wage of the postman was applied even after work changed because at first I was adopted as the postman that is higher wage than worker of distributing mails.  So I was able to work easily and get much money.

  • 英語の添削お願いします。

    この文章を添削していただけませんか? 「父は昔、テーブルマナーに厳しかったが、現在は注意しなくなった。」という内容です。 特に、時制は正しいかを知りたいです。 長文ですが、よろしくお願いします。  My father would often say to me, “Table manners are important for you.” When I was a child, my father was strict on table manners. He was always stern with me, but he was especially fastidious about table manners. For example, he said, “Don’t put your elbow on the table.”or “Don’t speak while eating anything.” These examples are general table manners. That is why he used to make a big fuss over my table manners, every time I ate.  Furthermore, My father was pedantic about even trivial matters. For instance, he said, “Don’t leave even a single grain.” This was really difficult for me. When I finished eating, I had to show my rice bowl to my father, because he wanted to check if I had eaten every grain of rice. If hadn't, I had to eat again. This bothered me, but I now realize that eating even the last grain of rice was to show my respect for a person who had cooked for me.  I hated such my father when I was a child. However, as I got older, he no longer told me about my table manners. Probably, this was because he could not find any faults in my table manners which I must have improved since. Now, I can understand his strictness on table manners. Mealtimes are not only the time when we eat something but also the time when we can enhance friendship with someone. Good table manners make the other feel good, but bad manners hurt their feelings. Therefore table manners are very important.  Thanks to my father, I don’t have any problems about them. These days, parents are not strict on table manners. However, I think that parents should show good table manners to their children. I want to be a father who is strict on table manners like my father in the future.

  • 英語プレゼンテーション

    明日英語のプレゼンがあるのでどなたか添削をお願いします 英語に関しての知識が全くといっていいほど無いので、訂正して頂けるとありがたいです Hi,everyone. I am going to give a presentation about my parents. First of all, I respect my parents. Because they gave birth to me, and they brought me up. My father is a very severe person. I was not able to approach my father when I am young. Because he was taciturn and stern. However, he worked really hard. My father is office worker. He was working overtime almost everyday. He was going to work on Sunday. It is thanks to father that can spend snug life. I want to become father like him. In addition, My mother is a kind woman. She has brought me up heartily. She is very humorous. I am so happy when I talk with her. She works in supermarket about 3days a week. She succesfully combined her job and housework. She always disguise her sorrow. I suppose it shows her excellence. But it sometimes makes me worry about her very much. I regard them not only my good friend but also a mentor for life. I want to treasure our friendship forever. I have the utmost respect for my parents. Thank you very much for kind attention. こんにちはみなさん。私は両親について発表しようと思います。 まず、私は両親を尊敬しています。 なぜなら、私を産んで育ててくれたからです。 私の父はとても厳しい人です。 私は幼い頃父に近寄ることが出来ませんでした。 なぜなら、彼は顔が怖くて、無口だからです。 けれど、彼は仕事に一生懸命でした。 私の父は会社員です。彼はほぼ毎日残業をしていました。 彼は日曜日にも出勤していました。 私が何不自由なく暮らせるのは父のおかげです。 私は彼のような父親なりたいと思います。 更に、私の母はとても優しい女性です。 彼女は私を一生懸命育ててくれました。 彼女はとてもユーモラスです。 私は彼女と話している時、とても楽しいです。 彼女は私の職業選択の際に相談に乗ってくれました。 私の母は週3日ほどスーパーに勤めています。 彼女は仕事と家事を両立させています。 彼女はその苦労を決して顔には出しません。 それはすごいことだと思います。 しかし、私は時々彼女のことがとても心配になります。 彼らは私のよき友であり、人生の大先輩でもあります。 私はこれからも彼らとの絆を大事にしていきたいです。 私は両親をこの上なく尊敬しています。 ご静聴ありがとうございました。

  • 英語が正しいか教えてください。

    Firstly, I maintain that the exam. Now, children have to do exam in my country. Mid-term test is part of exam. They study for mid-term test. My score is very bad when I was junior high school student. I was very sad. This is because I have study hard. It is true I could give good score, but I had given the exam for go to high school. My friend had given the exam too. While she have study hard, she couldn’t gave the exam. It is because she gave off heat on the day of the exam. Now, however, she is very happy. After all, she can do what she wants to do. I think it was luck. I didn’t know it happens. Now, but, I thinking it was luck. So I suppose that luck is important very much. この英文が正しいかどうか教えてください。 間違いがあれば、指摘してほしいです。 よろしくお願いします。

  • 英作文の添削をお願いします  

    欲を言えば例文だけでなく間違いの箇所の指摘をしてくれると助かります。 彼は家まで車で送りましょうかと言ってくれたが、私はその申し出を丁寧に断り、駅までゆっくり歩いていった。 He said that he would drive me home but I refused it politely and strolled to the station. 私の家は大通り沿いにあるので、道路の騒音に悩んでいる。 Because my house is on the big street, I have the trouble that the street is noisy. 翌日彼女に会うので、彼は早く寝ることにした。 He decided to sleep early to meet her the next day. 試験の日が近づくにつれて、彼らはだんだん神経質になっていった。 As the day of the exam was approaching, they got more and more nervous.

  • 英作文

    学校の課題で、"My High School Days"という題で英作文をしました。 文法的な間違いや、不自然な部分等あると思いますので、添削していただこうと、質問させていただきました。 よろしくお願いいたします。 I went attended ABC High School. This school was founded in 1961 by Taro Oda. It is co-education now. But it was a boys' school before 1994, DEF girl's High School was next to it. They merged it in 1994 and became ABC High School. It has generally course only now. But generally course has three courses, A course, B course and C course. When I was senior, there were 48 classes in this school, and more than 1,700 students were studying in this school. I belonged to B course. In the B course, we studied aiming at entrance to school to the university. I and my friends always went to the school by bicycle. I was doing it for exercise and a saving. It takes me about fifty minutes from my home to the school. My favorite subject is civics. I liked the modern society in particular. My best friends in high school were Yuichi Masuda, Yoshitaka Ito and Toshimitsu Kato. We used to go to Miyawaki Bookstore or Book Square in Matsusaka after school by bicycle. It was late that I always arrived at the house because these bookstores were long way from my house. I belonged to the rugby club. But I have never play rugby. Because my teacher made me and my friend the member of the club by force to direct our life and to let me study. So we studied mathematics in the teacher's room while other members did club activities. My impressive teacher was Mr. Ishimoto. He was my teacher when I was junior, and teacher was mathematics and rugby club. He was severe, grim and strong.  Therefore I and my friends could not disobey. If we had not good exam result, he punched us. So my friends studied English and mathematics very hard. But I knew his good point. He always thought about students. Therefore he was very strict with us. It will not still change.

  • 英語の添削

    今度英語で発表することになったのですが、一応考えたのですが自信が無いので添削をお願いします。 Good afternoon everyone. My name is ○○ and today I am going to talk about my favorite trip. This year I went to Malaysia with my friends. Malaysia is a country near the equator. Everyday the weather is very nice so there was very hot. But I enjoyed this trip and want to go to Malaysia again. I will tell you about three reasons why this was my favorite trip. First, Malaysian food was very delicious. There are many races so we can eat various food such as Indian and Chinese and so on. I was so happy to eat Nyonya food. Nyonya food is mixing Malaysian food and Chinese food. Malaysian food taste mostly spicy but everything was very delicious. Second, Malaysia has many famous historic building. I went to Kuala Lumpur and Malacca. I went to tour the Twin-Tower and the Blue Mosque. Twin-Tower is the third highest around the world. In Malacca, I rode a trishaw. Trishaw is like "Zinrikishya". It looks beautiful and the view of outside is wonderful. Finally, I went to Spa. Malaysia is famous for Spa so Malaysian people often reserve the Spa. To my surprise, there is a bath with a lot of flowers. the massage make me feel very comfortable and happy. In short, this was a great trip. if you think to go to foreign countries, I want you to go to Malaysia. I think you will surely be a wonderful trip. おかしければ文章自体を変えてもらってもかまいません。 添削よろしくお願いします。

  • 【英語】添削お願いします  大学でやりたいこと

     添削お願いします、テーマは大学でやりたいことです。  I want to study how to speak English well at the college. I have studied mainly how to write and read it since I was twelve. So, I'm very poor at listening and speaking it. Indeed it is important to be able to write and read, because the capacity is necessary when I read books or papers and to copy what a professor is writing on a blackboard. However, if I can't listen or speak, I can't communicate with others when I go abroad. I think it is not practical only to be able to write and read. That's why, I want to enhance my capacity of listening and speaking English.