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Shimo-pyの回答

  • Shimo-py
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回答No.2

◆はじめ。  (1)came over はちょっと変。向こうから歩いてきたような感じ。     この場合は、天から与えられたという感じで、     A new hero was given to us one year ago.     のほうがいい。     この文脈でいう日本語の「我が家」は、     英語だと「わたしたち」のほうが普通です。  (2)「それがあなた、○○です」 It is you, ○○. you を先にします。 ◆その次。  (1)gentle が二回続くのは、やや陳腐な印象あり。     赤ちゃんに gentle nature はちょっとおかしいかな…と思います。     (ここは判断しきれないが…)  (2)additionally は、付け加えて言うなら、って感じで変。     代案として、On top of that, 「その上;それに」なんていうのはいかが。  (3)Just looking at them を主語にするのは間違っていませんが、     私なら、「あなたを見つめているだけで」とするかな。  たとえば、私ならこんな感じにまとめるかも。参考になれば…  You are really angelic, having gentle eyes.  You dance before us (または in front of us), and it is very charming. Just looking at you, we are happy.  あなたはやさしいまなざしを持っていて、天使のよう。  あなたは私たちの前でダンスしてくれるけど、それがとても愛らしい。  あなたを見ているだけで、私達は幸せな気分になれるよ。 ◆その次。  (1)接続詞の though は、  (2)continue to は、ないほうがいい。 Though you are just a baby now, you will continue to grow mature through your acquired various experiences. 今はまだ赤ちゃんだけど、これからも様々な経験を積んで成長していくんだね。 ◆(※1) In this world,while there are recognizable matters,there are invisibleness .  → 文法的に不可。recognizable は目に見えないものも含めますので不適。  代案  In this world, there are both visible and invisible things.  または  In this world, not everything is visible.  または  In this world, not all is visible. ◆(※2) Also,while you will meet a lot of different people, there are many people that you will never meet all your life.  → Also は不要。while はこの場所でも間違いはないが、真ん中のコンマの後のほうがよさそう。all your life はここでは in your life にしたほうが良い。   どちらにしようか迷っているという第二案の英文のほうが、わたしはきれいだと思いますが、その場合も、also は不要ですし、all を in にしたほうが良い。  代案  You will meet many people, while there are more people you will never meet in your life.  あなたはたくさんの人に出会うでしょうが、生涯で出会うことのない人々はもっと多くいるのです。  ※「もっと多くいる」が嫌で、「多くいる」にしたいなら、more は many にします。   また、「同じくらい多くいる」にしたいなら、more は as many にします。 途中ですが、長くなっちゃったので、ひとまずこのへんで…

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