Should I be concerned?

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  • Talk to your girlfriend about this. You don’t have to open with “we haven’t used this vibrator together and now I’m anxious about whether you want to have sex with me or might cheat,” but she may very well have no idea that this has brought up so many feelings of insecurity and anxiety for you.
  • It’s possible that the “dead batteries” line was an excuse to avoid something she didn’t know how to discuss at the time, and it’s also possible that the batteries really were dead and she didn’t consider the matter urgent.
  • Tell her what you want rather than hoping she will offer it without prompting. Whatever the outcome, you have to share what you’re thinking, what you’re afraid of, and what you want with her.
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she may very well

Q. Should I be concerned?: My girlfriend recently bought a vibrator for us to use together (we’re both women). However, it’s been a couple months and we haven’t used it together once. We have had sex several times, but once we were in bed and I suggested we use it and she said it had dead batteries. Should it upset or worry me that she is clearly using it on her own time? I don’t want to be controlling of her body. We are always together—it’s not as if I’m away on trips and she is lonely—so why wouldn’t she just initiate sex with me rather than using the vibrator? It makes me feel scared and offended—is she not satisfied by me? What’s next, cheating? I know how ridiculous that may sound, but it’s just a fear and I don’t know how to handle this. A: Talk to your girlfriend about this. You don’t have to open with “we haven’t used this vibrator together and now I’m anxious about whether you want to have sex with me or might cheat,” but she may very well have no idea that this has brought up so many feelings of insecurity and anxiety for you. It’s possible that the “dead batteries” line was an excuse to avoid something she didn’t know how to discuss at the time, and it’s also possible that the batteries really were dead and she didn’t consider the matter urgent. Tell her what you want rather than hoping she will offer it without prompting. (For what it’s worth, masturbation and sex are not the same thing; the fact that your girlfriend sometimes masturbates with a vibrator is not necessarily a referendum on how she feels about having sex with you. If your sex life is otherwise satisfying, then I think this is a fear you can let go of.) Whatever the outcome, you have to share what you’re thinking, what you’re afraid of, and what you want with her. she may very wellの訳は「彼女が~するものもわかる」でしょうか?あと、ここでの referendumの訳し方を教えてください。よろしくお願いします

  • corta
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  • koncha108
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回答No.1

(それにしてなんちゅう相談と回答だろう) she may very well は > she may very wellの訳は「彼女が~するものもわかる」でしょうか? これは、相談の主が彼女に直接彼女がどう思っているのか聞いた時に、実際には彼女がどう思っているかの可能性の話なので、意味は上の通りですが訳は工夫が必要です。 but she may very well have no idea that this has brought up so many feelings of insecurity and anxiety for you. 「でも彼女がこのことがあなたにいろいろ不安な気持ちや心配を与えているなんて思いもしていないなんていうことは言う事は十分あるでしょうね。」 referendumは、こう言う使い方をしているのははじめてみましたが、referendumの意味が国や自治体の意思や方向性を決めるための住民投票、なのでここでは、一人でバイブレーターを使うことが、二人でsexをすることに対して彼女がどうしたかを決める、意思の判断にはならないだろうと言うことで、「意思の判断」で良いかと思います。

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