- ベストアンサー
私らしく書けたでしょうか？語りかけるようにです。
misa629の回答
- misa629
- ベストアンサー率28% (2/7)
語りかける感じは出ていますが、少し分かりにくいところも多いです。 Hi, everyone! Everyday, I think about how I want to study English more and more! （ここはくっつけてしまった方が自然でしょう）I work 6 days a week, and it's a full-time job, so I am very busy. （これを付け加えると、次の文につながりやすいと思います） Do you want to know how I study English? Everybody at goo teaches me, and they are all very kind to me. I am lucky, because there are so many teachers! I am very thankful to them. Btw, I am writing this on the train on my way home. As usual, it is very crowded! But luckily, I was able to get a seat! A boy and a girl sitting on my sides are both sleeping. They are probably tired. Don't you think so? Me? I am now studying English on the train. See you later! 出来るだけ内容を変えないで直しました。どうですか？
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ありがとうございます、書き換えていただいた文章を読むと、私の知らない単語は一つもありません。何度も読み返し、洗練された”日記”が書けるよう頑張ります。