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この英文はあってますか?

・They can select their course from some one, if students graduate from this school. ・First, it is employment. In my school student of half is finding work. ・Feature of my school college is rate of employment. It is proud of about 100%. ・Second, it is going to Advanced Course for Engineering. ・If it graduates from Advanced Course for Engineering, the students take the same 'university graduate' as college graduate. ・Third, it is admission to a college. ・When my school students admit to a college from my school, they is taken for entrance examination for transfer students. ・But, An entrance examination for transfer students has few subjects than an entrance examination. ・In Gifu technical college, 30 percent or more of students admit to a college all over the country every year. ・そしてこの学校を卒業すると、いくつかの進路が選び取れます。 ・一つ目は就職です。岐阜高専では半数の生徒が就職していきます。 ・私の学校の特徴は就職率で約100%の就職率を誇っています。 ・二つ目は専攻科に進学することです。 ・専攻科を卒業すると大学卒業生と同じ'学士'を取得できます。 ・三つ目は大学への編入です。 ・私の学校から大学に編入する場合に編入試験を受けます。 ・しかしこの編入試験は入試試験より科目数が少ないことが利点です。 ・私の学校でも毎年三割以上の生徒が全国の大学へ編入しています。 以上ですが気づいた点や文法の間違いなどを教えてください。

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英国在住8年経験者です。一部だけで、しかもちょっと荒削りですが、ご参考までに。 ・そしてこの学校を卒業すると、いくつかの進路が選び取れます。 -> The graduates of the school can choose one of the several paths. 【"course"を進路と言う意味で使われているようですが、話題が学校の場合は特に、学校のcourse(学科)なのか、その後の進路のことなのかわかりにくいかと思います。】 ・岐阜高専では半数の生徒が就職していきます。 -> A half of Gifu Technical College graduates choose to seek employment. 【「岐阜高専では半数の卒業生が就職することを選びます。」ちょっと原文と違いますが、意味的にこういったことかと思いましたので】 ・私の学校の特徴は就職率で約100%の就職率を誇っています。 -> What makes our school special is its employment rate. We are proud to say that 100% of such graduates have succeeded in finding jobs. ・専攻科を卒業すると大学卒業生と同じ'学士'を取得できます。 The graduates of the advanced courses are award with the bachelor's degree, equivalent to that of universities. ・私の学校から大学に編入する場合に編入試験を受けます。 The students (of my school) who wish to be admitted to universities are required to take the admission exams. ・しかしこの編入試験は入試試験より科目数が少ないことが利点です。 Compared to the entrance exams, fewer subjects are tested in the admission exams, which is an advantage to the students. ・私の学校でも毎年三割以上の生徒が全国の大学へ編入しています。 More than 30% of the students are admitted to the universities all over Japan.

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質問者からのお礼

なるほど、結構違っていますね(;・∀・) 主語を変えるコトで表現を変えて分かりやすくなっている部分もありますね。 原文と違っていても意味はあっています。 ありがとうございました 添削の英文を読み直し、もう一度作成していきたいと思います。

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