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 Paradoxically, it is the first factor - marring someone you do not love yet (but are attracted to ) that leads to the second one. In arranged marriages, the wedding is seen not as the concluding point, but only the beginning of a relationship that is marked more by hope than by expectation. Where couples in a "romantic" marriage might find the reality of everyday life a comedown after the excitement of the courtship period, the courtship dance in arranged marriages begins only after the wedding ceremony. As many South Asians with experience in this matter will enthusiastically tell you, this leads to the couple falling in love.    Are all arranged marriages successful? No more than all romantic marriages are. But, ultimately, what makes a marriage work is not how it began but what makes a marriage work is not how it began but what you do with it. Mutual respect, realistic expectations and a willingness to compromise may, in the long run, be more important than all the undying promises made in moments of passion. Marriage is a long race; it is learning the other's gait as you go. What matters is whether you are able to find a common rhythm.


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  • sayshe
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#1.です。第2段落冒頭部分に訂正です。 見合い結婚は、全て、上手く行くのでしょうか?恋愛結婚が、全て、上手く【行かない ⇒ 行くとは限らない】のと同じです。 【 】内を訂正します。失礼しました。


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  • sayshe
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逆説的に言えば、それは、第2の要素につながる第1の要素、すなわち、愛してはいない(が、魅力を感じている)人との結婚、なのです。見合い結婚では、結婚は、ゴールではなく、期待よりも希望の印が付いた関係の始まりにすぎないと見なされます。「恋愛」結婚で誕生した夫婦は、求愛期間の興奮状態の後、日常生活の現実を期待はずれと思うかもしれませんが、見合い結婚での求愛のダンスは、結婚式の後でようやく始まるのです。こうしたことの経験のある南アジアの人々の多くが、熱心に語るように、このこと(結婚後に愛情を育むこと)が、愛し合う夫婦を生み出すことになるのです。 見合い結婚は、全て、上手く行くのでしょうか?恋愛結婚が、全て、上手く行かないのと同じです。しかし、結局は、結婚を上手く機能させるものは、結婚の始まり方ではなく、結婚にどの様に対処してゆくかなのです。お互いに対する尊敬、現実的な期待、妥協しようという心構えが、長い目で見れば、情熱の最中になされた永遠の約束全てよりも大切なのかもしれません。結婚は、長距離レースです;それは、歩みながら相手の足取りを知ることなのです。大切なことは、共通の足取りを見出せるかどうかです。



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