A Feeling Deep Inside You: The Pathetic Darkness

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  • A feeling deep inside you, that silent voice that calls you telling you that you're simply pathetic and useless, nothing more than an impotent wretch sitting alone in the darkness. Praying for something to reach in and grab you, to wrench you from this cold solitary existence and blind you with a light brighter than the sun.
  • In the abyss of ticking seconds, minutes, hours, you find yourself longing for a way out. You can see a faint glimmer of hope in the distance, like a beacon in the dark fabric of interim. But will it be enough to pull you out?
  • The poem portrays the inner turmoil of a person trapped in their own self-doubt and despair. The voice inside their head constantly reminds them of their inadequacy, leading them to long for a rescue from their lonely existence. The mention of a bright light symbolizes their desire for a drastic change and an escape from the darkness.
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詩の添削をお願い致します。。

長くて申し訳ありませんが、友人より詩を頂きましたので、自分なりに訳しました。どなたか添削をして頂けると、助かります。 宜しくお願い致します。 A feeling deep inside you, that silent voice that calls you telling you that your simply pathetic and useless, nothing more than an impotent wretch sitting alone in the darkness, laying silently in an abyss of ticking seconds, minutes, hours. Praying for something to reach in and grab you by the wrists and wrench you from this cold solitary existence and blind you with a light brighter than the sun. You can see it out there in the distance; a pen prick in the black fabric of interim. Like a beacon. 心の奥底から感じるあの静かな声、あなたに呼びかけ話す。 あなたの単に哀れで無益で、暗闇の中で一人で座っている無力な人 以外の何物でもない。 時間切れの淵に静かに横たわっている。 秒、分、時間 何かの為に祈り、この冷たい独りぼっちの存在から手を伸ばして そしてあなたの手首を掴んで、ねじる。 そして太陽より明るい明りであなたを盲目にする。 あなたは、外から遠くでそれを見ることができます。 一時的に黒い布のペンの刺し傷。 灯台のように

  • 英語
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  • ありがとう数1

質問者が選んだベストアンサー

  • ベストアンサー
  • hokaze
  • ベストアンサー率45% (9/20)
回答No.1

添削ではなくなってしまっていますが…; 詩のようにするとしたらこんな感じでしょうか? 軽く作ったので、いろいろおかしいかもしれません;; ------------------------------- 貴女の中で ずっと深くで 感じているのは 静かなあの声 哀れな貴女 無力な貴女 ただ座ってるのは時間の無駄よ? 数分だけ 数時間だけ そう言っている間もカチカチ秒針が追い掛け回す ほら 貴女の時間はもう終わり 孤独の闇に告げる音 響いたのを貴女も聞いたでしょう? ほら 掴んで 暗い空間から手を伸ばして 冷たくて孤独な存在から 今救い出してあげるから… 太陽よりも明るい光で 貴女を盲目にする祈りを捧げよう それでもきっと 貴女には遠くからそれが見れるでしょう…? だから伸ばして 手を伸ばして 黒い布 ペンの刺し傷 それは ただ標識のように…

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