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Mr.Childrenの歌詞を

　ミスチルのイノセントワールドをカナダ人の先生に紹介したく、勉強にもなるだろうと歌詞を英訳しました。一応英文科なのですがまだまだ勉強不足で・・・。でも必死で訳しました。「ちょっとここは文法的におかしいような」とか「○○がよく訳せてる」などご指摘や感想をお願いします。 Mr.Childrenのイノセントワールドを外国人の先生に紹介したく、１時間半かけて英訳しました。どちらかと言うと和訳のほうが得意なのですが達成感を味わいたく、また勉強にもなるので頑張りました。日本の歌は歌詞が抽象的なことが多いのでとても難しいです。明日あたりにプリントアウトして見せたいのでどこかおかしなところはないか、また簡単な感想をお願いします！ In those days that we hugged each other behind in the evening of town fitted my mind Thoughtless words sometime damaged people’s mind and you are not here now Nowadays, I think tenderly of pitiful myself in the mirror Ah, I am me forever and I will keep on walking anywhere with dreams Is it all right? “Mr. myself” The melody that flowing this heart everyday It goes along the mind lightly and gently I wish I could meet you somewhere before I climb a steep path with sunshine , innocent world Recently, even the topics about supper are sullied by job I found that I have lost myself watching things from various angles Though I always balance the books in involved relationship Ah, don’t you think it is good we sometime entrust our body with the wind? Oh, “Miss yourself” I sing as thinking about seasons full of love beating by listless rain in June I will show you my smiling face that I have lost without notice And I will set waving feeling free beyond the rainbow A piece of dream will appear in a corner of town go on changing now And I will go on having a faint light in my heart tomorrow also Is it all right? “Mr. myself” The melody that flowing this heart everyday It is sad and gently, so I feel painful in my heart I wish I could meet you somewhere before I climb a steep path with sunshine If we could meet, let’s smile and set it free “innocent world” Innocent world that continue limitless

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  • helhel
  • ベストアンサー率0% (0/1)
回答No.1

＞In those days that we hugged each other behind in the evening of town fitted my mind 前置詞を含む名詞は主語になれないので文頭のinはいらないです。 behind in the evening of townはおかしいので behind a town in the eveningならいいです ＞Thoughtless words sometime damaged people’s mind and you are not here now 私なら Thoughtless words sometime hurt people and you are not here now にします。 ＞Ah, I am me forever and I will keep on walking anywhere with dreams I am meはまずいです。 I am what I am nowでどうですか？ ＞The melody that flowing this heart everyday thatを関係代名詞とするならwhichのほうがいいのと flowingの前にisはいります。 なんならthatは抜いたほうがいいです。 あと、flowは自動詞ですからflowing through this heartにします。 thisよりmyのほうがいいと思うので The melody flowing through my heart everyday にします。 ＞I wish I could meet you somewhere before I climb a steep path with sunshine I wish I could meet you somewhere again before I climb over a sunny hill はどうですか？ ＞Recently, even the topics about supper are sullied by job Recentlyは基本現在完了とともに使います。 In these daysがいいと思います。 それとjobは可算です。 ＞I found that I have lost myself watching things from various angles watchingよりseeingのほうがいいと思います。 ＞Though I always balance the books in involved relationship relationshipは限定されれば冠詞が付きます。in a involved relationship ＞Ah, don’t you think it is good we sometime entrust our body with the wind? our bodyのbodyは可算。 ＞I sing as thinking about seasons full of love beating by listless rain in June beatingはbeatenです ＞I will show you my smiling face that I have lost without notice 細かいことを言うようですが、withoutは同時に行えるときにつかいます。 たとえば、He went out without saying bye. 出ていくのと同時にさよならはいえます。 よって、under conscienceなどでいいかと ＞A piece of dream will appear in a corner of town go on changing now townは可算。 townのあとにwhichをいれてgoをgoesにする、 もしくはgoをgoingにする。 ＞Innocent world that continue limitless continueはcontinuesです。 聞いたことがなかったし時間がなかったので間違ってたら申しわけないです。 歌詞は受け取り方が違うのでできるだけ質問者さんのを原型としました。 頑張った跡がいっぱいありましたよ。 先生喜ばれるといいですね^^

  1. カテゴリ
  2. 趣味・娯楽・エンターテイメント
  3. 音楽・ダンス
  4. 国内アーティスト

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