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朝日新聞の４コマ漫画の描写を英語にして英作文を練習している者です。 次の英文から状況が読み取れるかお聞きしたいです。また、文法間違い英語表現の間違いなどご指摘していただけるとありがたいです。 One day a teacher was smoking in back of a school building. Her students, a usual trio, found it by chance. She gave them some candies for hush money. When they were licking the candies, three girls came up and said, "(1)You, bad. You are licking candies." The usual trio thought it would be terrible if this came out to everyone, so that they told the teacher's secret. Three girls went to the teacher and said, "(2)We were told that for hush money." 特に、(1)「あんた達、悪いんだ。アメなめてやがる。」と(2）「口止め料の 代りに教えてもらったんだ。」と言いたいのですが、上の英文はどうでしょうか？アドバイスよろしくお願いします。
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ちょっと最後のオチが良く分からなかったのですが・・・ One day a teacher was smoking in back of a school building. One dayの後にコンマ あと、なんとなくaじゃなくthe school buildingな気がします。 Her students, a usual trio, found it by chance. 文章のつながり的に「彼女がたばこを吸っている時に」見つけられたとした方がいいと思いました。 あとusual torioというのは正しくない単語の使い方だと思います。普通の三人組・普通じゃない三人組とは言わないので。（仲良し三人組の意だと思いますが） あとItではなく彼女を見つけたのでHer。 While she was smoking, three of her students who all the time spend time together found her by chance. So（をつけた方がいいかも）,She gave them some candies for hush money. 口止め料ってHush Moneyって言うの、今はじめて知りました 笑 When they were licking candies, three girls came and said, "(1)You, bad. You are licking candies." The trio thought it would be terrible if this came out to everyone so that they told the teacher's secret. Three girls went to {see} the teacher and said, 最後は意味が良く分かりませんでした。 大体言いたい事は伝わる文でしたが、全体を流して読むと文章と文章の間がぶつ切りなために一連の流れが良くないように思います。 一文を書いた後にwhile ,after that, then, so, finally, eventually等の時間をあらわす単語やbecause・・・など（例えば彼らに見つかってしまったので飴をあげましたとか）を書き足して状況を説明すると時間の流れや人物の行動が分かりやすくなると思います。
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参考ですが、 a teacher のあとに teacher の描写を入れたらいいかも。 （例）who looks so beautiful(/dangerous/etc.) 漫画を見てないのでよくわかりませんが、 We are told that for hush money. 意味が通じにくいと思います。話の落ちですからインパクトがもっとほしいと思います。 They told us the way to get candies. They told us everything. We know everything. Give us candies, please. 先生が「I need to tell them off.」 とか参考です。 文は読みやすかったです。仮定法もOKです。 in backyard of the(/a) school
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とても参考になります。thatよりもeverythingの方がいいなと思いました。ありがとうございます。
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自信がないので、誤りがあればご指摘お願いします。 ↓ 私が昨日会った4人の中学生のうち3人が、数学は得意ではないが英語は得意だと言った。 Three out of four junior high school students who I met yesterday said that they were not good at math but good at English.
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次の４コマの内容を英語にしました。文法や英語の表現、文の流れなどおかしな点がありましたらご指摘よろしくお願いします。最初の１文は提示されたものです。 「(1)２人の子どもが走りながら電車に乗ってくる。母親は気にしていない様子。(2)電車の中でも座らずに騒いでいる。乗客は嫌な顔をしている。母親は話に夢中。(3)おじいさんがQuiet!と言う。(4)子どもは静かになり、母親は恐縮している。」 One day, the children got on a train with their mothers. The children ran into the train, however their mothers didn't care about the children's behavior. The children were so cheerful that they couldn't be seating on the train. The passengers felt they were noisy. On the other hand their mothers were occupied in talking each other. Suddenly, an old man next to their mothers said to the children, "Quiet!" They got very surprised. They at last stopped making a noise and their mothers stopped talking. There was peace returning on the train. よろしくお願いします。
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So she said to Tommy , "Why would anyone write about school?" Tommy looked at her. “Because it's not our kind of school , stupid. This is the old kind of school that they had hundreds of years ago. He added , saying the word carefully , “Centuries ago.” Margie was hurt. “Well , I don't know what kind of school they had all that time ago.” She read the book over his shoulder for a while. Then she said , "Anyway , they had a teacher." “Sure they had a teacher , but it wasn't a regular teacher. It was a man” “A man? How could a man be a teacher?” “Well , he just told the boys and girls things. He gave them homework and asked them questions.” “A man isn't smart enough.” “Sure he is. My father knows as much as my teacher.” “He can't. A man can't know as much as a teacher.” “He knows almost as much , I'm sure.” Margie wasn't prepared to argue. She said , "I wouldn't want a strange man in my house to teach me." Tommy laughed. “You don't know much , Margie. The teachers didn't live in the house. They had a special building , and all the kids went there.” “And all the kids learned the same thing?” “Sure , if they were the same age.” “But my mother says a teacher has to be adjusted to fit the mind of each boy and girl it teaches. Each kid has to be taught in different ways.” “Just the same , they didn't do it that way then. If you don't like it , you don't have to read the book.” “I don't say I don't like it , ” Margie said quickly. She wented to read about those funny schools. They weren't even half finished when Margie's mother called , “Margie! School!” Margie looked up. “Not yet , Mama.” “Now,” said Mrs. Jones. “And it's probably time for Tommy , too” Margie said to Tommy , “Can I read the book some more with you after school?” “Maybe,”he said. He walked away whistling , the book under his arm.
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翻訳機は使わないでください^^; So she said to Tammy, "Why would anyone write about school?" Tommy looked at her. "Because it's not our kind of school, stupid. This is the old kind of school that they had hundreds of years ago." He added, saying the word carefully, " Centuries ago." Margie was hurt. "Well, I don't know what kind of school they had all that time ago." She read the book over his shoulder for a while. Then she said, "Anyway, they had a teacher." "Sure they had a teacher, but it wasn't a regular teacher. It was a man." "A man? How could a man be a teacher?" "Well, he just told the boys and girls things. He gave them homework and asked them questions." "A man isn't smart enough." "Sure he is. My father knows as much as my teacher." "He can't. A man can't know as much as a teacher." "He knows almost as much, I'm sure." Margie wasn't prepared to argue. She said, "I wouldn't want a strange man in my house to teach me." Tommy laughed. 'You don't know much, Margie. The teachers didn't live in the house. They had a special building, and all the kids went there." "And all the kids learned the same thing?' "Sure, if they were the same age." "But my mother says a teacher has to be adjusted to fit the mind of each boy and girl it teaches. Each kid has to be taught in different ways." "Just the same, they didn't do it that way then. If you don't like it, you don't have to read the book." "I didn't say I didn't like it," Margie said quickly. She wanted to read about those funny schools. They weren't even half finished when Margie's mother called, "Margie! School!" Margie looked up. "Not yet, Mama." "Now," said Mrs. Jones. "And it's probably time for Tommy, too." Margie said to Tommy, "Can I read the book some more with you after school?' "Maybe," he said. He walked away whistling, the book under his arm.
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丁寧な回答ありがとうございます。usual trioとは言わないですか。。。「いつもの三人組（いたずらばかりしている３人組）」と言いたかったのですが。またgo to＋人というのはあまり使わないのでしょうか？seeを入れていたので疑問に思いました。接続詞や時間を表す副詞を上手に使えるように工夫してみます。とても参考になります。よければ２点について補足説明をよろしくお願いします。