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英作文の添削

明日英語ライティングのテストで、自由英作文の問題がそっくりそのまま出るとのことです。 そこでどなたか簡単に添削していただけないでしょうか。 問題:次のテーマについて賛成か反対かを明らかにし、60語程度の英語で自分の意見を述べなさい “Schools in Japan should have classes on Saturdays.” 1)I don’t think schools in Japan should have classes on Saturdays. 2)First, Japanese students are too busy, so they should have more free time to play with their friends. 3)Second, they don’t have much time to study what they want to study. 4)That time will lead Japan to more creative country. 5)For these reasons, I consider classes on Saturdays are not needed. (62語) よろしくお願いします。

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  • 回答No.2

あなたの意図は十分に伝わっていますが、こんなものでどうでしょうか。 1 I don't agree with the topic. 2 First, Japanese students don't have enough time to spend with friends because we are very busy doing work. 3 Second, we need more time to do what we really want to. 4 Then we will make Japan a more creative country. 5 That is why I don't think classes on saturday aren't necessary. (56語) 勝手に変えてすみません。まあこんな考え方もあるというぐらいで見てください。 なお、more creative countryの前にはaが必要です。4)のところはthat timeよりもsuch free timeかthe free timeぐらいでは。

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質問者からのお礼

冠詞とthat time のところ理解しました ありがとうございました

関連するQ&A

  • 英作文をしたのですが自信がありません。文法等の添削、内容についてのアド

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  • 自由英作文の添削お願いします。

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その他の回答 (1)

  • 回答No.1

テストの答を事前に人に聞くのはフェアじゃないんじゃないですか。 あなたのクラスの全員に同じ機会を与えるべきです。

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質問者からの補足

すいません ただ、問題を作る(その問題を出す)先生自身も先週までなら添削をやってくれてたようなのです。 それに出しそびれてしまったので、ここでお願いしているわけです。 そういうことなので、もしよかったら、よろしくお願いします。

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