英文 ”お気に入りの本” を添削していただけますか

質問

My favorite book is Memoirs of a geisha.
I saw a movie Sayuri with my wife on the second of January.
I was quite impressed by the movie.
I came back home and I looked for the information about Sayuri.
I knew the book Memoirs of a geisha at Amazon in America and there were a lot of spotlight reviews.
I bought it at Amazon in Japan.
So I've been reading the book because I wanted to know Japanese culture in English.
I sometimes felt tears come to my eyes to read the sad story of her life.

私のお気に入りの本は　memoirs of a geisha です
１月２日にさゆりを見て　感激しました　家に帰り調べたらたくさんのコメントが　アメリカアマゾンに書いてありました　さっそく買い読んでますが　時々彼女の悲しい人生に涙します。

回答No.1

Deerhunter · ベストアンサー

基本はしっかり書けているようですね。

>I saw a movie Sayuri with my wife on the second of January.
I saw a movie titled Sayuri or I saw Sayuri

>I knew the book Memoirs of a geisha at Amazon in America and there were a lot of spotlight reviews.
I found the book, Memories of a Geisha, on Amazon.com

>I bought it at Amazon in Japan.
I bought it on Aamazon.co.jp

>So I've been reading the book because I wanted to know Japanese culture in English.
because I want to know more about Japanese culture or to know how Japanese culture is described in English.

>I sometimes felt tears come to my eyes to read the sad story of her life
I sometimes felt tears briming in my eyes as I read .....

以上細かな指摘でした。慣れてきたらもっと接続詞など活用して、各文のつながりを滑らかにするように心がけると良いと思いますよ。I　で始まる文が多すぎると見かけがあまり良くありませんので。

お礼

添削ありがとうございました。なるほどです。どうしても　Ｉ　を使うことが多くなり悩んでます　何か各文のつながりを滑らかにするようにするテキストがありましたら　教えてください。

回答No.3

sakurasaku-haru

ちょっと、英作文のつもりで頑張ってみます。
My favorite book is "Memoirs of a Geisha".
I saw a movie with my wife on January 2nd.
The title of the movie is SAYURI, and I was quite impressed by the movie.
This film based on a nobel, and "Memoirs of a Geisha"is a title of the nobel.
After I came back home, I tried to find more information on the internet about the nobel.
I found a lot of good comments on the nobelat the web site of Amazon.com.
I bought it and read because I want to know how to describe the japanese culture in english.
Sometimes her tragic life story makes me cry.
ああ、私のほうが添削して欲しくなりました。

お礼

ありがとうございます　英作文　書いていただいて。

回答No.2

Chicago243

私もIで始まる文が多いと思います
I saw a movie Sayuri with my wife on the second of January. I was quite impressed by the movie.

->I saw a movie Sayuri with my wife on the second of January. It touched (or stirred) my heart. (or It really got to me. )

これでIが減りますね。

I came back home and I looked for the information about Sayuri.

->I came back home and looked for the information about Sayuri.

Or
->I went straight to look for the information about Sayuri after coming back home.

I knew the book Memoirs of a geisha at Amazon in America and there were a lot of spotlight reviews.

->And then (finally) I found that Amazon in America sells the original book, Memoirs of a geisha. Surprisingly, lots of spotlight reviews were described on the web site.

I bought it at Amazon in Japan.
->I ended up buying it at Amazon in Japan.

I bought it at Amazon in Japan.
So I've been reading the book because I wanted to know Japanese culture in English.

-> Now, I am in the middle of reading it. It is very intriguing for me to know what Japanese culture from the viewpoint of Westerners is like.

I sometimes felt tears come to my eyes to read the sad story of her life.

-> Her life was so sad that I couldn't help feeling tears come to my eyes during reading it.

お礼

I を少なくする例文ありがとうございました　何回も音読してみます。Chicagoさんは　シカゴに住んでられるのか　住んでいらしたのですか。