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英作文の添削おねがいします!!!

添削おねがいします!!場所名は○○になってます。ここはこうした方がいいよ etc アドバイスもらえると嬉しいです!!!  (1)「Today I went to a english cafe called ○○ in ○○.(昨日○○にある○○というえいごカフェに行きました)Actually,before I went there Iwas so nervous and I felt uneaseness.(実際、そこに行く前とても緊張していて、不安でした。←ここのMy english is....のis は現在形ではまずいですか?)Because my english is terrible and I didnt know what kind of people were there.(なぜなら、私の英語はひどいし そこには、どんな人がいるか分からなかったからです)But once I entered cafe,tthere were very freindly people and lots of foreiner like from America, Germany,Korea.(でも、いったんカフェに入ると、フレンドリーで、たくさんの外国の人 アメリカ、ドイツ、韓国からの人がいました。We were talking about lots of thing and we played shiritori game.(私たちは色々な事について話をしたり、しりとりをして遊びました)I had a wonderful time!!I wanna go there again!!(最高な時間をすごせました。また行きたいです!) (2)Im studying TOEIC to get to a good score at home.(TOEICで良い点をとる為に、家で勉強している)←これからも継続して勉強しつづける意味を府含んで書いたつもりなんですけど、これって今家で勉強してますっていうニュアンスになっちゃいますか?

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  • 英語
  • 回答数4
  • 閲覧数80
  • ありがとう数8

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  • ベストアンサー
  • 回答No.4
  • ecoyan
  • ベストアンサー率40% (68/166)

完璧ではないかもしれませんが、こう直せば意味も十分通じると思いますョ。 Yesterday I visited an English café called 000. I found myself getting very nervous when I got there and felt uneasy because my English ability was so poor besides that I had no idea what kind people were there in the cafe. But when I entered inside the cafe, I found many friendly people from various countries as the US, Germany and Korea. We talked about a lot of things and also played a game called shiritori. I had a great time there and I really would like to visit there again. I am studying English to get a good score for(又はin?) TOEIC test.

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その他の回答 (3)

  • 回答No.3

直した方が良いところだけ書きますね。 I went to an English cafe called ○○ in ○○. Once I entered the cafe, There were very friendly people and lots of foreigners who were from the U.S.A., Germany and Korea. We talked about lots of things and .... (2) I've been studying English to get a better score. 細かいことですが、aとかtheとかつけるとより英語っぽいですよ。 因みに wannaはwant toの省略ではないですよ。英国ではwannaは書き言葉ではないですし、育ちが悪いとか思われますので注意してくださいね。

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  • 回答No.2
  • wsdrs
  • ベストアンサー率50% (1/2)

(2)ですが、To take a good point in TOEIC, I keep studying at home. という風に書いたほうが自然ではないでしょうか?これがその日本語訳に一番合っていますし、勉強をし続けるという内容も書けると思います。

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  • 回答No.1

english ? Today   昨日? Iwas  ? I wanna ? まず、基本を押さえましょう。

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質問者からの補足

 (1)yesterday の勘違いです。  (2)Iwas は Iとwasの間にあるスペースを打ち忘れたため。  (3)wanna はwant to の略です。

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